This is all very intentional. Don’t believe it? Ask a Mom in Family Court.

Custody Peace
8 min readJun 25, 2022

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What we are witnessing with the overturn of Roe v. Wade is a direct reflection of the evidence-based gender bias & injustices that are present in the lower family courts throughout the U.S. (and throughout the globe) that deprive women and children of their basic human rights and right to live free from harm.

Unfortunately, everything that has recently happened in the United States is not surprising at all to Protective Mothers who continue to navigate Family Court in this country. Maybe you should start listening to them. They fight for their freedom every single day under the most extreme conditions.

“There’s nothing inherently unique about how SCOTUS treats women. Women in Family Court experience this every day and many lawmakers are well aware of this. The uniqueness lies in the visibility and the reach — millions of women are impacted by this decision instead of one woman and her children.”

“Women and children have been compromised by Family Courts across this nation, for a very, very long time,” states Kaitlyn Jorgensen, Survivor Advocate and Protective Mother. “What we’re witnessing in the Supreme Court is a direct reflection of the gender bias, misogyny, and the injustices present in the lower courts that have been acknowledged by the United Nations and validated by experts and research throughout the globe time and time again. There’s nothing inherently unique about how SCOTUS treats women. Women in Family Court experience this every day and many lawmakers are well aware of this. The uniqueness lies in the visibility and the reach — millions of women are impacted by this decision instead of one woman and her children.”

Protective Mothers are safe parents who call upon the family courts to protect their children and themselves from an abusive parent who is attempting to obtain custody of their children as a means of maintaining power and control (also see Coercive Control or Post-Separation Abuse).

These mothers are some of the strongest, compassionate and loving women on the planet. — They have decades of collective experience fighting for their basic human rights and the rights of their children to live safe from harm — they are highly aware of the darkness and deep-rooted misogyny that lies within our legal system and know how to navigate gender bias and the abusive coercive and controlling behaviors of individuals & institutions to ensure that justice prevails — They tend to know what’s coming next as a means of survival and Friday’s Supreme Court decision was no exception.

“This decision is exactly what the patriarchy has worked towards.”

“Our nation's Supreme Court Justices have turned over Roe v Wade thereby giving states the power to ban abortion. These Justices have used their power and control to render a decision that strips away the autonomy of an entire gender. It’s the epitome of systemic Coercive Control. It’s the betrayal of all women and girls — half of our nation. A similar betrayal is witnessed in family courts every day throughout the U.S. This decision is exactly what the patriarchy has worked towards,” stated Dr. Christine Marie Cocchiola who is an expert in Coercive Control, with a focus on Family Court.

If you haven’t accepted that our beloved “home of the brave” is intentional about removing all agency from women and children it’s time to face it.

There has been an active attack on the agency, basic human rights, and safety of women and children since the birth of our country. If you hear anyone say they are shocked by Friday’s ruling that overturned Roe vs. Wade, have them scroll through the last two years of our Instagram feed or read our Complaint to the United Nations Commission on the Status of Women about how women and children are stripped of their basic human rights every day in family courts across the United States, and throughout the globe.

On August 1, 2021, together with One Mom’s Battle, Custody Peace, and Movement of Mothers, over one hundred mothers submitted a formal Complaint to the United Nations Commission on the Status of Women denouncing the United States Government, and the states within, for systematic human rights violations waged against women and children throughout the family court systems in the country. The Complaint alleges human rights violations that include systemic gender bias, discrimination on the basis of sex, and facilitation of physical, sexual, financial, legal, and emotional abuse of women and children. Through personal letters submitted with the Complaint, these 100+ women provided firsthand accounts of their experience suffering injustices and human rights violations in family courts throughout the U.S.

This is just one example of how Protective Mothers (in the U.S and worldwide) in family court have been sounding the alarm on this for years and only a few select people have listened. — And yet, miraculously, some conservative lawmakers woke up this morning (on a Saturday), had a cup of coffee, banned abortion in their state, and made a video about how much they care about children and how precious life is. We can’t.

“The message is loud and clear; women are second-class citizens. A message that those of us who have experienced the Family Court System receive on a daily basis.”

“What happened in America this week is triggering for many of us Protective Mothers because at the underbelly of this decision is the misogynistic need for power and control. We have removed women’s rights to decide what is safe for their own bodies. Once again, the message is loud and clear; women are second-class citizens. A message that those of us who have experienced the Family Court System receive on a daily basis,” stated Tina Swithin, Author, long-time advocate, and Founder of One Mom’s Battle and National Family Court Awareness Month.

Swithin continued, “if this decision were truly about babies, we would collectively be demanding better of our present-day Child Protection Services system, our Foster Care System, and Family Court System before we further burdened them to the point of collapse. These three systems are flawed, and utterly failing and children are currently dying in their hands. The Supreme Court decision will have devastating consequences on these agencies and these babies will grow into children who will face neglect, abuse, and in some cases, death. I have been advocating for the safety of children for over ten years and the Supreme Court’s decision couldn’t be less about the well-being and safety of children.”

Still not convinced about the intentionality?

Did you know that women in the United States have been fighting to have the Equal Rights Amendment included in the Constitution for 100 years? It consists of these simple words: “Equality of rights under the law shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex.”

As of January 27, 2022, the ERA has met all the constitutional requirements for the adoption of an amendment to the Constitution of the United States. Naturally, Advocates asked the U.S. Archivist to rightfully publish the ERA.

Although it was part of his job description, he did not.

On February 10, 2022, three Senators, Romney, Johnson, and Portman, sent a letter to the U.S. Archivist demanding that he not publish the ERA as the 28th amendment to the U.S. Constitution. — The intentions behind anyone fighting to keep this one simple line out of our Constitution, a line that would ensure equality for every woman and girl in America, are the exact reasons why we needed the ERA to be included and why on Friday, millions of women in the United States just officially became second class citizens.

And then there’s this...

All of the developed nations in the world have ratified the United Nations Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW) except for one — The United States.

This treaty focuses on women’s rights and women’s issues worldwide. It is both an international bill of rights for women and an agenda of action. Originally adopted by the U.N. in 1979, nearly all member nations have ratified this treaty. Curiously absent is the United States, which has never formally done so.

Although the United States was one of the first signatories of CEDAW by President Jimmy Carter in 1979, they did not have the political leverage to get senators to act on the measure. The Senate Foreign Relations Committee, which is charged with ratifying treaties and international agreements, has debated CEDAW five times since 1980. In 1994, the Foreign Relations Committee held hearings on CEDAW and recommended it be ratified. But North Carolina Sen. Jesse Helms, a leading conservative and longtime CEDAW opponent (red flag), used his seniority to block the measure from going to the full Senate. Similar debates in 2002 and 2010 also failed to advance the treaty.

Not shocking that in all instances, opposition to CEDAW has come primarily from conservative politicians and religious leaders, who argue that the treaty is at best unnecessary and at worst subjects the U.S. to the whims of an international agency (read that again). Other opponents have cited CEDAW’s advocacy of reproductive rights and enforcement of gender-neutral work rules. (Audible sigh).

The United Nations Convention on the Rights of a Child (UNCRC) is another international human rights treaty that sets out the civil, political, economic, social, health, and cultural rights of children. It calls on States Parties to take all appropriate measures to ensure that children’s rights and safety are protected. It has been ratified by all developed nations throughout the world, however, the United States is not one of them.

“It’s not this beautiful thing of wanting to just appreciate and love your rights. It’s about understanding it’s a fight.” — Angelina Jolie

“We do know what is absolutely healthy and decent and fair for a child. There is intent to silence children. There is intent to control children. There is intent to turn a blind eye and allow others to harm children,” stated Human Rights Activist Angelina Jolie in a recent video with Amnesty International, and added, “It’s not this beautiful thing of wanting to just appreciate and love your rights. It’s about understanding it’s a fight.”

And here’s one more crucial takeaway that any Protective Mother or Domestic Violence survivor is well aware of (as well as many lawmakers) that has financial, health, and societal implications for EVERYONE on our planet…

Dr. Emma Katz, Author and leading international expert in coercive control states, “The issues of domestic abuse survivors being failed by systems and the loss of rights to access safe abortions are strongly linked. A research paper by Miller et al (2010) reported startling results from a survey that was administered to 1278 females aged 16–29 years attending family planning clinics in California. 53% percent of the women reported physical or sexual partner violence, 19% reported experiencing pregnancy coercion and 15% reported birth control sabotage. If these results represent the national picture, that would be 1 in 5 American women being subjected by their male partner to pregnancy coercion (a form of domestic abuse), and 1 in 6 American women whose male partners were intentionally trying to get them pregnant against their will (also domestic abuse). The loss of access to safe, legal abortions is another blow to domestic abuse victims-survivors, a blow not from their abusive partners, but from their country itself.”

It’s time for everyone to have radical acceptance of the true dark intentions of some with unchecked power in the United States that many of us are already well aware of. — it’s also time to organize and actively demand our rights and freedoms — for ourselves and our children, something Protective Mothers from around the globe have been doing for decades.

May this moment in time be the start of the change we have been waiting for — one that Protective Mothers absolutely knew was coming and have been preparing for.

As we navigate our collective future, find hope in the magic of sisterhood as we have, stay grounded, find ways to empower yourself —and as Survivor Advocate Kaitlyn Jorgensen says, “be grateful that you finally have real clarity about the intentional nature of what we’re truly up against, then strategize and organize.”

It’s go time.

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Custody Peace

An intersectional approach to replacing cycles of abuse in our homes, systems and planet with natural cycles of health, healing & regeneration.